By Folarin Ayomide
The first few weeks of class were hell, running to classes so I can get a seat. Oh I made so many enemies in those few weeks but we are friends now. Here we go.
On this eventful day, i had another class immediately after a 1pm-2pm lecture and the lecture venues were quite far apart (1000 seater to AUD 2).
Hence the race began, all of us running like thieves, (no big girl in this matter o, or else big girl will sit on the floor),,sweating like a terrorist wearing a bomb. 😃😃😃
I got to a set of stairs and all hell broke loose,,, I kept running when I should have slowed down, I missed a step and rolled the rest of the way down.
Dazed, but unhurt except for a few scratches,, 😜 😜, I was inclined to sit down there and blame OAU for building so many steps and fixing lectures at far-apart venues but as I don’t like to embarrass my lineage, I jejely carried myself up since nobody could stop running long enough to carry me. I started the race again.
Surprisingly, I got to class early enough to be able to hussle for seat, quickly, sighting an empty seat, I rushed towards it. Getting there I place my bag on the desk in front of the seat, and was pleading with classmates seating on the edge to let me enter and sit,naso one guy just come from nowhere, jumped table and sat. Enh!!!
“Bros, are you visually impaired, you no see bag for front?.”
The Bros:- “Are you talking to me?
Me:-” Noo, I’m talking to your inner man. Ode. ”
While this drama was unfolding, lecture had not yet commenced and classmates were gathering around us.
Me:-” anhanh, you deaf join? I say stand up.
The Bros:- “I’m sorry I can’t stand up and please don’t insult me.”
Me:- “e ma gbami o, e ma wo bobo yi sha, I got to this seat first but because I wanted to pass the proper way, I was delayed, you now jump table like thief sit down they tell me rubbish,abeg stand up oga, before I embarrass you.
Bros:-” see this girl o, are you talking to me like that, why are you so mannerless? “.
Me :- “I’m mannerless abi, sha stand up and lemme worry about my manners. Ode”
The guy no wan gree o.
The Bros :- “I can’t stand up o, so you better kill me”.
Enhenh,, kill you abi. You will hear ween today, I probably would have just let go but the memory of the ‘fall on the stairs’ did not allow me.
By this time, classmates were already booing the guy and advising him to stand up ‘bet’ I guess his ego did not allow him do so,, ok I entered and sat on that same seat, instructed the occupants of that row of seats to take their seats.
Now a girl was sitting on the other side of the Bros so he was sandwiched between us,, quickly planning with her, we almost squeezed the life out of him!!!. He tried to squeeze back, and everybody on the row of seat squeezed him right back. 😆😆. *Note:- Lecture had commenced at this time.
20 minutes into the lecture, the Bros was as limp as ‘efo left out in the sun ‘. Oniyeye. Stylishly, he excused himself and left the seat ooo.
To be cont’d.
Folarin Ayomide is a student of Obafemi Awolowo University, English language department.
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